Legacy Accepted!

Legacy Accepted

My paternal grandparents, "Nana" and "Bombom" were aging, and it was time for them to move out of their beautiful home of 30 years from Aptos in Santa Cruz County to Los Angeles, where they would be near their youngest son, Dan, and daughter-in-law, Debbie. Their Aptos home was the place I had always known as my home, my place of refuge. The most stable place during my childhood. Mommer and I moved so often, theirs was the place I always knew what to expect. Rules were unbendable, love was abundant, the food was delicious, and I was wholeheartedly welcome.

            The house was huge, to me anyway. It sat at the tip of the neighborhood, in between two enormous fairways on a golf course. To the right of their home was the fairway leading to the putting green; to the left the teeing ground. Their house had nooks throughout where I could play and hide. One could find their imagination in such a home. Not only did it provide that imagination for me, but it also provided stability throughout my childhood.

            In order to help with their relocation, I left my family behind in Colorado and journeyed to California for a long weekend. I went to help Nana and Bombom pack and to hold a garage sale.  My grandparents were the most stable people in my life and it felt right to help with their transition. We had a great time that weekend. We went through and packed many of their belongings, and had a successful garage sale. My mom, dad, and my Uncle Dan were all there to help, too.

            One day while packing up the basement, I came across a drawer full of old sewing projects that Nana had never completed. I sifted through them, relishing in her craft. Nana had taught me at a  young age how to cross-stitch. I remember spending long, rainy days on her couch creating and practicing stitches, as she sat next to me knitting or cross-stitching her own extensive piece of art. I remember feeling excited over my learning and for spending such creative time with her. She was patient with me and helped to make corrections when I made mistakes. She showed me how to count and outline. It was an artful skill that I was thrilled to learn.

            Over the years I have made many different cross-stitches. I made Bombom a framed sign that said: “Anyone can be a grandfather but it takes someone special to be a Bombom.” I loved creating that gift. I made Mommer a dish towel with a series of turtles walking across the bottom (ironic). I’ve made each of my children personalized birth records with an animal representing each of them – For Tierzah, a lion; Warren, a monkey; and Nicholas, an elephant. This art gave me an outlet when I was feeling stressed out. It gave me something to create when I felt lonely. As a tween, after moving to Hawai’i, my best friend, Jennifer*, and I would sit together in the hallway of our 4-bedroom home that we shared and work for hours on our individual cross-stitches. As a teenager, I would spend long summers in Mountain View, California with my dad. He worked long days, and I would stay at home and watch TV or listen to the radio; the entire time working on one cross-stitch or another in order to pass the time.

            As I packed this drawer of unfinished business from Nana’s basement, she came to check on my progress. I asked if she wanted to take any of these pieces to her new home. She said no. She said she would never finish them.  Just then I came across a special unfinished piece – a map of the Hawaiian Islands bordered by a ring of different Hawaiian flowers; colorful and vibrant. It felt full of life; although, it was half completed. I was mesmerized by it. I asked Nana if I could have it. She asked me what for and I told her that I’d like to finish it.   She said, “Oh, you don’t have to do that. You don’t have the time for that!” I told her it would be my honor to complete it, indeed, for us both. I knew her eyes and fingers would never be able to work together to complete this beautiful piece, and it was significant to me because it brought back memories of my time in Hawai’i.

            While I lived on Kaua'i, every spring break Nana and Bombom would visit their timeshare on Maui. They would fly me over to visit them every year. It was a wonderful, memorable time. I remember eating Hula pie at their favorite restaurant and swimming with them at Napili beach. I remember strolling with them along the streets of Lahaina,  doing all of the touristy things like holding a stack of colorful, squawking parrots, eating mounds of ice cream, and touring some extremely inappropriate shops (we wandered into a sex shop by accident one time where Bombom found an object of which caused me extreme embarrassment when he approached me and asked, “Brooke, what’s this?” as he turned it on and it started to vibrate). We would play under, around, up, and on the banyan tree.

            This particular cross-stitch was more to me than just a piece of tapestry. It was an homage to our time together on Maui, to a part of my life that created great happiness and pride, and to all the things she taught me. I explained to Nana that I would love to take this piece home. If I never finished it, that would be okay too, but I would like to try. She relented and allowed me to have it.

            For a long time, the piece did sit in a drawer at my house. I had many other obligations that preceded any time-consuming craft such as this. But inevitably, I rediscovered it and held true to my promise. I began working on it and sewed my heart out for it. I wanted to complete it so that she could hang it in her apartment, knowing that we worked together to complete this piece of art. One day I did finish it! I had it framed and sent it to her for Mother’s Day which was two days away from her birthday. In the corner, our initials were woven together creating two B’s, an H and an S standing for Betty/Brooke Heller/Smith.

            It hung in her apartment's entryway until her passing. And of course, I inherited it after. It now hangs in my office, directly behind me as I sit writing about it; a proud piece representing my relationship with my grandmother, reminding me of all my time and experiences with her, all she taught me, all the love she exuded throughout the years. It expresses all our love and our entire relationship. I’m proud to have completed it and proud to be able to show it off.

            It’s a hearty piece filled with dedication and stoicism. There are a lot of happenings that fill the gaps between each piece of string that creates a colorful piece of art. What was going on around me when I sewed together this bit? What was happening in Nana’s life when she sewed this part? Over and over again, you can hear life’s work embroidered into the tapestry. Kids and grandkids, love and life, all hanging right there on my wall as a reminder of our worlds.

Additionally, the memories of Hawai’i hang in this piece. The vacations and the love, and the time together. All of it, memories filling a gap for what is no longer here, but not to be forgotten either. The cross-stitched piece, woven alongside my writing, will be remembered for generations. Our great-great-great-grandchildren will rediscover this story (Hi guys!). 

            Thank you, Nana, for giving me the opportunity to finish your artwork, even when you thought I wouldn’t. This is an heirloom that will reside in our family for generations, to be certain.

What hearty legacy has been passed on to you?

Dreamweaver's Life-coaching